date: Tue 1 August 2003 20:35 GMT
subject: Understand the group approach …You have to get her warmed up before she will give back more substance. She has to get used to the idea of you…
To understand the group approach you need to first understand something about regular, blind, never spoke to her, she has not winked at you approaches. Then you can scale up from there.
Many guys make the consistent mistake of believing an approach should allow the beginning of a fifty-fifty conversation.
But most girls, experiencing a stranger, are not going to provide anywhere near 50%. More like 10%. She’ll answer questions with lines like “fine” or “It’s a girl’s night out” – useless comments like that.
You have to get her warmed up before she will give back more substance. She has to get used to the idea of you. This period can take a few minutes. Meanwhile, you have to keep things going. Most guys stall. They are just plain, not used to doing this type of work. It’s akin to being a on stage by yourself. It may look like you are with someone but you are in fact all alone. Most guys get freaked, don’t have material, lack confidence or whatever – they can not do it.
It is not something that happens in their daily life. Develop material which can stand alone or develop some routines which have the illusion of needing support but in fact stand alone – very powerful. I’ll explain more detail on that later.
To return to the subject of groups. You have all of these challenges only magnified. Suddenly you have 2 or 5 or 10 people from which you have to keep attention. And the percentage dynamic is still in effect.
So if you work a set of three the ratio is now 270%-30%. Seems impossible to provide 270%. You are just one man. Work it. Get as close as possible.
Commit all the way. Anything less than 100% will get you killed.
Okay, not really killed. Just humiliated in front of a group, which for some people is worse than death.
Use sweeping gestures.
Use routines which allow illusionary input.
Do not expect help from the group or a wing. You are surrounded by people, but you effectively are all alone.
But you will win them over with your humor and charm. Be prepared to make many new friends. Buy a bigger calendar. Be ready to one on one the group’s beautiful women. You will succeed.
Once you are in with the group you will be returned to the 90-10% scenario again when you one-one the groups cute girl. Sheeesh…more work… but you are in – in baby!
After you turn around a few skeptical groups into liking you it will give you great confidence and understanding. You may arrive at a new level of consciousness.
Of course there is much more to working groups than this. If this topic continues I will post more.