date: Fri 19 Dec 2002 14:25 GMT
subject: The Story Telling Theory … Remember to cut all details down to the bare essentials that make your story logical and then add liberal amounts of your reaction …
Story Telling A good story should not be to entertain or show that you are a cool guy. A good story is used to attract. Cut all the unnecessary facts from a story and just talk about how you react to the situation.
Remember to cut all details down to the bare essentials that make your story logical and then add liberal amounts of your reaction and how you feel about the events. That humanizing will make people into you and not your material. Better yet. Just get into the space where you are talking about your feelings and reactions and you will not have to preplan a canned story it will just flow out along with all the rest.
In general try to avoid searching for good material. Anything can be a good story. You need to develop your ability to relate and express a story. Once you get good at this, you can create interest out of thin air.
Anybody can get attention by telling a story which is in it’s own nature entertaining. That type of ‘good’ material WILL keep attention, but in the end it is the story which is interesting and not you. That is bad.
I can not express this strongly enough. AVOID INTERESTING STORIES. They can be a mirage which will lead you away from seduction.
Also keep in mind that ‘interesting’ material can be hijacked. You will be the center of attention, talking about some great topic and then some other guy or CB just has to get in their story or views on the same subject and then boom, you are no long the center of attention.
Instead develop your ability to make the mundane fascinating. Once you can do this, then your listener will associate good feelings with you and not your material.
For example, I sometimes challenge guys to use their most fascinating material, whether it be palm reading, NLP, a story about seeing two girls fight or whatever and I will just recite my grocery shopping list. Then we will see who does better. That is what you need to do. Get really freaking good at making your groceries interesting. Do that and you will realize that it is not what you talk about but how you talk about it.
Use dramatic pauses, hooks and expressions. Really get into your story. Also never just spill your story out. Instead make your listeners want to hear more. Pause and look at them. Wait for their interest to show. Play on their curiosity and refuse to ‘entertain’ them. They must show interest on their faces and in their questions or else do not continue – your story and performance is valuable. Try not to just give it away.
As far as sexual stories go, personally I talk about some of the things that have happened to me with other women. This is typically a money subject. The stories subtly relate ideas I want to get across (You may want to relate different ideas) Like I am good in bed, I am a player who is up for a purely sexual relationship, women seek me out, I am high maintenance (If I am considering this girl for MLTR) etc… Of course these all appear to be just things that are in the story and not the point of the story so it doesn’t look like I’m bragging or something.
Okay, so here is my recommendation to you:
Everyday in the evening, think of what you did that day and package it into a story. Practice it a few times and then go out and use the “How are you opener.” That goes like this:
You: “How are you?” Her: “I’m fine…” or whatever. Her: “How are you?”
Or if she doesn’t reciprocate you say playfully, “Don’t you think it’s rude to not ask how I am after I asked how you are?”
Her: “Okay, how are you?”
(note: In general asking a question like this at the beginning of an interaction is dangerous. You leave yourself open for her to say flatly, “No, I don’t.” The key is to perform it very playfully. But there is still a chance of being burned here – just figure it into your calculations)
You: “I’m great. Today I went shopping….” or “I laid on the couch…” or whatever you did that day.
Then the next night re-write your stories based on what you did that day and soon. You never use the same story twice and you get real good at telling stories.
Remember it’s all on the delivery. Practice saying the most mundane, regular things in an interesting manner. Practice in front of a mirror and consider video recording yourself.
Also, once you get good at ‘performing’ stories you will get good at coming up with material spontaneously. This is because you will know what type of things to look for and where to go. Many guys think that they can not come up with something to talk about. But the real problem that they don’t realize is that they have too many things to talk about. Getting good at performing will give you the ability to narrow these choices down and make you ‘quicker thinking’.
Over all slow down and try to shorten your stories. Cut out the facts and put in more of how you feel. When you can do that, you will be able to spin stories about the most simplest things into attraction.