Outcome Independence

Quick Definition: The mindset of not focusing on a specific result or growing attached to any outcome.

Full Definition:

Outcome independence is an important mindset to have when approaching pickup. Many GPUAs and newbies make the mistake of chasing after a specific outcome, such as getting a phone number or getting a close, so much that they come across as being needy. Having an outcome oriented mindset makes a PUA reaction seeking, and, when he doesn’t get the reaction that he desired, he becomes upset or disappointed.

Don’t be like this kid

A better approach to take is to be outcome independent. By not caring about the outcome of any specific interaction, a PUA comes across as less needy and does not put too much pressure on a woman. This detached approach of indifference paradoxically makes women more attracted to the PUA because they don’t come across as desperate. They also become more of a challenge for the woman to win over.

Outcome independence goes hand in hand with having an abundance mentality. By realizing that there are more attractive women than can ever be met in a lifetime, the PUA is able not put too much significance on any specific set or interaction, which allows him to relax and have fun—attractive qualities.

Another way to gain outcome independence is to focus on the learning experience of doing approaches, rather than any specific outcome. No matter how well or poorly a set goes, the PUA gains experience that he can learn from, and thus the value is in having done the approach, rather than the result. In this way, the PUA becomes outcome independent, and every set he approaches is reframed as a success, regardless of the outcome.

Adam on Outcome Independence in pickup:

Related Terms: Abundance Mentality, Process Over Outcome, Inner Game, Frame, Approval Seeking