Written by AlphaWolf
First of all, before I give you the process and principles of getting a girlfriend, you must be careful about what you wish for. Getting a girlfriend comes with it relatively constant sex, but it also involves responsibilities and the occasional sacrifice. With the title of “boyfriend” comes other experiences. So make sure first that this is your goal.
If you are reading this, chances are you have already made up your mind about finding a girlfriend. If so, let’s get started:
Most guys get girlfriends based on luck and within their social circle. This basically happens as guys mingle with girls. In school, co-ed dorms and on campus parties ensures that plenty of opportunities are available, and the average guy will have a chance to hook up with girls and even begin long term relationships. As sex is relatively new for most teenagers, romances will swift and blossom. After graduation, most guys find girlfriends through the following ways:
- People in the office and coworkers
- Online dating
- Small social circle of young professionals
- Other events and activities outside of work
- Through friends of friends
However, this level of game relies mainly on luck, your ability to make friends and keep them, and factors such as charisma and good looks. Sometimes, a woman will pick you and give you a chance to date her.
What if you decided that you want to take matters into your own hand? Screw luck, and focus instead of personal will?
Finding girls means:
- Living in a location where beautiful girls are
- Initiating interactions with girls
- Starting conversations or activities with girls
- Getting to know the girl
- Asking her out on a “date” or an event where you can spend more time with her
- Continue dating and ensuring that each date brings you closer
- Reaching the point where she feels adequately invested in you to be your girlfriend
Meet. Date. Date over time. Build Intimacy. This is another way of looking at it.
If you are more metrics-oriented, follow these guidlines:
1) Meet as many girls as you can.
2) Go on dates. Lots of dates.
3) When dating, make sure each subsequent date progresses more and more. You don’t want to sleep with her too often if you want a girlfriend, however you do want to reach that point where she WILL allow you to sleep with her, IF YOU CHOOSE TO. This ensures power in your favor, and the ability to move things forward.
Preselection: you will notice after you get a girl that other girls start noticing you more. This is called preselection. Women tend to favor men who are already chosen by other women. Ironic, isn’t it? Be aware of the opportunities you are passing up. As long as your girlfriend makes you feel special and you are willing to let the other girls go because of her, great. Be aware that most guys rationalize the risk of losing the girl to not going after other girls. PUAs know that really, they are looking for the one girl that will make them forget about the rest. But never settle for something if you know you can do better.
Don’t get stuck on you first girlfriend. A lot of guys develop one-itis syndrome if they never had a girlfriend in school. This is because they become addicted to regular sex and the intimacy of the person. However, be aware of what you learn in terms of what you like and don’t like about a person. These things are important as you determine your ideal choice in a mate for life. Oftentimes, the guy can become over-dependency on the first girl, and this will wear her down and she will leave him. Ironically, this is the best way for the artist to learn about himself and what he really wants.
Different life stages determine different types of relationships. In College, a cool, carefree girl who likes to have fun is the way to go. As you get older, perhaps you need someone who is smarter and can bare responsibilities of an adult. Or maybe you need someone who is more dominant than you, or a woman who is a supporter of your efforts to bring in money.
Even Marilyn Monroe dated multiple men of different backgrounds, from Joe DiMaggio in the beginning of her career, a ex-Baseball star who is dominant but mean to her at times, to later on in her life, the supporter and kind writer Arthur Miller who lacks dominance and looks, but took very good care of her in times of need.
There’s another girl around the corner. Remember to never take rejection personally. Like a job interview, dating has a process, and it should never hit you at that level. Take any criticism constructively, and use common sense to see if it was well deserved or simply mean.
To your success,
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