This book saved my life and I wanted to share it with you.
They say that time heals all things, but the truth I have come to realize is that you can proactively change your thinking patterns to achieve your goal in life. Controlling your emotions, instead of letting your emotions control you. I found the interview with Michael Jordan pretty amazing. Look at how he thinks when dealing with his father’s murder on Oprah.
His quotes: “I am a pretty optimistic person”:
Having been in love, I know what it feels like. Here’s a small snippet:
You may feel like you’re suffering. You replay images of your intimate times together with your Ex. Even among friends and when with other women, you still think about her and these thoughts create a cycle of negative feelings and energy in your own body. You feel helpless to stop it.
Dr. Deborah Phillips has been treating patients who are suffering from loss of love for decades, and in her original book published over 20 years ago, she had a 100 out of 100 patient success rate.
The techniques are organized in the order of effectiveness, and just trying the first 2 have helped me tremendously. They sound simple however they need to be implemented correctly and practiced. The first one involves Thought Stopping. This requires you do an exercise with a few very positive experiences that you can remember. It also requires you to keep track of the times you have thoughts of your Ex. The rumination that occurs when you start having these thoughts. The experiment is akin to stopping a dog before they do something bad. Because they live in the moment (see Cesar Milan on YouTube). The same process in your brain’s neuro-connections are wired in a way that automatically makes thoughts of your Ex cycle into these silent movies of tenderness, intimacy and PAIN. If you want the pain to stop, you need to practice stopping these thoughts.
When I first started these techniques I was afraid. I was also averse to NOT loving her and the book title turned me away. What you have to realize is that the process is 100% reversible. You just have to be intimate with that person again. Falling in love with someone that you already loved is easy, because those neuro-connections already exist in your brain’s tissues. However the priority right now is to repair your pain and prevent the CYCLE OF PAIN.
Julien also talks about developing abundance again, after a tough break up, and not being afraid of “ground zero”:
This too shall pass.
I hope this helps, and good on you for having loved courageously!