• Female Pick Up Artist (FPUA)

    by AlphaWolf & Co.

    Quick Definition: A woman who uses PUA techniques to pick up men.

    Note: See the Female PUAs and Female Gurus page here

    Full Definition:

    Female pickup artists are women who adopt the tricks and techniques of the seduction community and apply them to seducing the men they desire. While pickup has long been a male dominated industry, there are an increasing number of women becoming involved in the pickup community as well, either as wing girls or as actual female puas.

    Traditional gender roles have dictated that men are the ones expected to pick up, while women have played the role of those being picked up on. However, with the rise of feminism and the blurring of gender roles, women have increasingly taken a more aggressive approach to their dating lives, not content with simply waiting around and hoping to be picked.

    There are also women who are forced to pick up, such as bisexual women and lesbians. Such women often face the same difficulties that men have when approaching girls. Because there are few sources that deal with their specific situations, many such women have turned to the seduction community for advice.

    It is somewhat ironic that women are starting to learn pickup, because many PUA techniques such as active disinterest, body rocking, and qualification are techniques that were originally developed by modeling women who used the very same techniques on men. With the rise of female PUAs and the popularizing of the seduction community, the game has come full circle.


    That girl is a total fpua; she just ran the cube on me!

    Related Terms: Wingwoman, AFOG, Tandem Hunting, PUA, Seduction Community, Girl Game

    Source: Cruise

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  • Related Posts


    Deviant July 9, 2010 - 2:47 pm

    I’m a guy who took a boot camp and is currently working developing on his game. I’ve received support from some of my friends and harsh criticism from others. I saw that their reasons for acting the way they did often didn’t have much to do with me or my goal, but to protect their own egos; this was reflected on both sides. I’ve enjoyed reading this discussion and the differing standpoints. And I see how most of arguments are not only about the context, but personal ego. The comments that are pretty much all about ego are not productive in any way. They don’t win respect from or convince either someone who disagrees or any bystanders who were simply reading the discussion.

    Male students who take boot camps roughly have a 75% attrition rate. The majority of them give up before they get whatever goals they had (one night stands, short term relationships, long term relationships, etc…). Some considered me stupid for joining, I understand this.

    Regarding FPUA’s, the proof is in the pudding. It’d be great to go find women that are 4-7 in looks and consider themselves FPUA’s. If they can pull men/women that the majority of women would consider 9’s and 10’s, then there is something to FPUA’s. An easier way to gather data would be looking at the success rate of Kesia’s female students. Let’s set the bar at 25% for comparison’s sake. If they pass, FPUA tactics might be effective. If the students can’t seem to reach that goal, either the instructors suck or its strong evidence that looks dictate the quality of man that a woman can pull.

    Lala July 27, 2010 - 11:59 am

    Hello I justed wanted to say that I think the FPUA is really really important.

    I myself have been raised christian and told that sex was a bad thing if you did it before you got married. Although I have always been able to get guys attention and am consired a 8 to 9 I always blew them off because I wasnt interested in sex.

    Well now Im 21 and figured I dont want to wait to have sex untill im married and I dont want to get married like till im 30 and 10 years without sex when my body is probably at the best shape of my life doesnt really sound smart.

    The only thing I worry about as a girl is my reputation. Once your know in you social circle as a slut it is finished for you So mabye the FPUA could teach us how to sleep around discreetly or finding a trustworthy fuckbuddy who wont tell. Also what we could learn is how to make sure that you can trust the guy (like not some asshole who will secretly tape you (seriously happend to a friend of mind.) Also how to not meet a rapist and mabye get out safetly when you change your mind and your not in a surrounding you know.

    And finally being a FPUA could mabye teach us how to settle down when you had your wild fun period.

    So whoever said being beautifull was enough (to get laid yeah thats true) Doesnt really understand the social aspect and yeah women do like to have sex but they want to do it in a smart& safe way.

    I think FPUA can really help and dont forget many girls have girlfriends but a some are really judgemental when it comes to sex and you really dont want to be be branded as a slut. … Just my 2 cents

    also to my fellow fpua a article that got me thinking: http://jezebel.com/5596772/my-sluthood-myself

    DeepUnderCover September 18, 2010 - 3:58 am

    I think the person who made the comment about once someone can get 10s whenever they want, it is at that point that personality starts to matter. This is where The Game becomes important for FPUAs.

    I can give you a very concrete example from my own life. I have had a 10 year relationship of sorts with someone I consider my visual and mental equal. I’d call us both an 8. We are similar in the way we banter and play and essentially “run game”. In fact, when we arrive at a social event, it’s almost like one of us is always winging the other, and we soon have a group of people surrounding us and hanging on our every word. We both like being the life of the party, we both seem to be naturals at running game, and we both enjoy being able to get other guys and girls, as well as having a good time with each other, as a result of these skills.

    As such, there has always been a lot of attraction between us, because we are both always trying to get the upper hand and be the one with the control in the relationship between the two of us.

    We have been together, been apart, lived on different continents, but whenever we are back together in the same place for a period of time, which is not that frequent these days, it is hot, and it is like not a moment has passed since the last time we saw each other.

    In our relationship, he has always had more control over the situation than I have. Being the girl, I have always had that intuitive sense of what to do to pull back, neg, control the situation, but he has spent a lot more years perfecting his game, and he is better at it than me at this point, because he has concentrated and studied to make himself so.

    My interest in FPUA boards is to reinforce the intuitive game I already have to see if I can finally get the upper hand in the situation between us. For me, it’s not just about getting sex. I can get sex whenever and with whomever I want.

    But I want to understand how to guarantee myself the upper hand in a specific relationship with a specific partner. I want to know how to seize that control to be the one who can get whata she wants, and to do that, I need to study game, in order to make it more of a science, rather than relying on my female intuition to get me through it.

    Does that make sense?

    alphawolf September 18, 2010 - 8:51 pm

    Hi Deep Under Cover

    I do understand what you are trying to say. In some ways I feel like that with strong men, the women is always “following him” in some sense. It may not be a forced following…. it is more like… there’s someone about her nature that makes her feel good for following a strong man. With that being said, there are so many details of female game in keeping the guy interested, and making sure he views you as the ultimate catch. This came to my attention as I was talking to my female friends who cannot get the guys they want.

    If you can write me an email at alphawolf @ pualingo I would love to ask you some questions about our next site idea.


    geekFPUA October 1, 2010 - 7:34 pm

    As a woman, I wasn’t until somewhat recently that I read through pickup terminology and games. But I can tell you that I’ve always done some of it.

    True, I could just wear short skirts and guys in bars would sleep with me. But that isn’t who I want. I want geek guys. Who tend to be Nice Guys, and certainly in college, most didn’t have the social skills or confidence to go and talk to someone they found attractive. (Why would I want geek guys? I went for the ones who were at the top of the class and hot. And then picked for not-asshole, interesting, and maybe could cook. Much better boyfriend material than bar types. Sure, blame feminism.)

    So the art of the pickup… I would use it to get someone who is near-mute around women to talk to me in the first place, and then to get them to actually feel comfortable talking to me. Etc.. If I am in high form, they will think that they are seducing me as things progress.

    Currently I’m engaged. I think it’ll work out well. He might be quiet and shy, but he is also quite stubborn — he’s able to take me on. He’s also incredibly hot in bed, and our kinks align very well.

    geekFPUA October 1, 2010 - 8:28 pm

    Lala: I was raised very Christian too. You don’t say how old you are, but don’t even think about settling down until you are 24 or older. Late 20s-early30s is probably much better. If you want kids, you might want to go on the earlier side of that. The more people you date, the better of an idea you will have of what you are looking for. Be picky. If something (various kinks come to mind here) is important to you, insist on it. You want someone you are animally attracted to. To be realistic, you could probably make something work with anybody long-term. That’s what they did in the old days, right? So how do you pick? When you consider all of their negative traits (if you can’t list them, you haven’t dated long enough or you aren’t being honest with yourself), but you can still see yourself spending the rest of your lives together, then you can think about settling down. For however that means to you….

    As to friends? Get new ones who are more sex-positive. There is no reason you should deprive yourself of something you want because of what somebody might think of you. This might be harder to find depending on what area you live in and what kind of people you have around. I recommend gay men and bisexuals. :D

    You should learn about yourself and your own sexual response first. Read some of the books that goodvibrations.com puts out. Or all of them. They have an excellent line that is hot and educational. Find out what turns you on. Reading about sex will make you feel more secure. Read up on safe sex. You have to know what your risk tolerance is and how to negotiate safe sex.

    Do a websearch and find the “resisting peer pressure” lines that in my time were for “just say no to drugs” or sex. Most recently I’ve seen them regarding condom use. They are all the same. Read through them a few times and you won’t forget them. If somebody uses one on you *for anything* you’ll instantly recognize it as manipulation. It will make it easier for you to decide what you want to do.

    You can be a FPUA, but there is no reason to just go for one-night stands. Surprise a guy by being “just friends” and then turning that into sex or whatever. And FWB are that: friends. You shouldn’t have to worry about crap. If you’re going to date complete strangers, look up “dead alarms”, and set one up with a friend before you go out. “Strangers” might be useful if you want to get away from your circle of friends.

    The only advice I can give you on making sure that a guy isn’t a jerk is to say that you should watch how they interact with other guys and their friends. Not how they act when they are alone with you or trying to impress you. You want to observe them “in the wild”. You can go for geeks and nerds. You’ll find that some of them are (or can quickly become) very good in bed. But just because someone is a nerd isn’t a guarantee that they won’t be an ass. You have to learn judgment. Actually, talk to them some via IMs. People are more likely to be open and say things they might not otherwise say. Guys want to sleep with you. You can get away with asking some pretty harsh questions if you’re careful. And then see how they answer.

    It can be hard to break out of “sex is bad”, but it is quite possible and fun.

    alphawolf October 3, 2010 - 1:02 am

    @ Geek FPUA, Thanks for the very insightful comments. I have a similar friend who is a total ivy league schooler and she only goes for geeky good looking guys, AKA the “alpha geek”. Her game is tailored around getting those guys.

    On a separate note, can you send me an email I have something to ask you regarding your experiences for a project we are working on. (alphawolf @ pualingo)


    Greywolf October 3, 2010 - 4:12 pm

    J and nevermind….you two are very angry human beings…maybe you should both get off the computer and go out and get laid…or meet in person and battle it out!…..Charming man…..you are a [email protected]#ing IDIOT!!!!!!

    Anton_Delgado October 24, 2010 - 11:43 am

    @ Nevermind or anyone who thinks women cant be PUA YOU ARE WRONG.
    All this mumbo jumbo about gender roles, and how women value men who are of higher value, and women are judged primarily on looks, although is valid, still doesn’t mean shit. Were we in any way designed to consume? Is it in our genetics to go out and buy stuff and spend money? I dont think so, so how come there are some amazing salesman and some shitty ones? Cuz people can always be manipulated mentally, if you know what your doing you can make a person do almost anything if you have enough skill and that goes for anyone anywhere man or female. If you ever read the art of seduction you would see that there are many ways to seduce that dont involve Alpha male ness etc. Cleopatra is famous for historians because she was UGLY and ran game on all the poor kings of the ancient world, ive met ugly girls who just have something about them, there is something sexy about them, and its usually based on their body language, which is more than 50% of what pua’s have to become skilled at. Every time you think a women cant be a pua, remember when there is a will there is a way, if a woman wants it enough she can become skilled at manipulating men in anyway including seduction, including the brad pitts of the world. Have you ever seen ugly female celebrities with ugly guys? didnt think so. thats the fucking truth. Cheers

    Soulman October 26, 2010 - 11:30 pm

    Out of curiosity, what would a FPUA be initially attracted to in a guy they are going to pick up in terms of physical looks?

    Never Mind October 28, 2010 - 9:07 am

    @ Anton_Delgado i am not wrong. You had better go back and read all my posts carefully if you do think i am wrong. You have obviously misunderstood me. A woman can be a PUA all she wants. My point it is a pointless title to have. Women are designed to be able to pick up men for the most part all they have to do is look the part, men are mostly the aggressors in picking up women. What is so hard to understand about that simple concept ?

    Soulman October 30, 2010 - 1:01 am

    I agree with NM, women are naturally better at gaming men anyways. My friends got gamed by two women at starbucks and recently had a 3 month relationship with her.

    Randy Assmann May 2, 2011 - 7:12 am

    yes for women its easy because there will always be men that are interested because many men chase everything with a skirt on. so its pointless. all the have to learn as women is filter out the men that are not interesting to them. thats just my opion

    alphawolf May 2, 2011 - 5:23 pm

    @ Randy

    Agreed. Filtering out potential candidates can be hard as well (if not harder) than picking up the ones you want.

    Randy Assmann May 6, 2011 - 12:13 pm

    i think women don’t realy need to be pickup artist because men will come to them anyway

    Charlotte May 22, 2011 - 6:06 am

    I’m a 19yr old girl at uni. I’d say I’m quite attractive (7/10, 8/10 on a night out-trying to be honest and not egoistical or modest!) I’m intelligent and not one of the ‘typical’ girls who seem to have no common sense or sense of humour about them. I do get approached on a regular basis when out, yet I still like to use PUA techniques. It gives you a sense of almost ‘getting one over’ on the cocky men who think they’re God’s gift to women. I don’t put myself about in skimpy clothes, flirting outrageously and ending up in a different bed every night-for me it’s more about the conversation and being able to get a guy wanting you even though there’s….’easier’ prospects out there.

    Soulman May 22, 2011 - 5:39 pm

    So you want to get a guy wanting you even though you get approached a lot..lol.

    Cocky guys are cocky because they are naturally that way, thus coming across as unobtainable.

    I don’t see why you would even bother with trying to get one up on the cocky guy if you just want conversations. Cocky guys just want sex.

    If you just want sex then you might as well sleep around with cocky guys.

    Also define your definition of ‘easier’ prospects.

    Guys will want you more if you have good rapport with them, well know fact that works with all my female friends. Cocky guy are very hard to build rapport with.

    RobRy June 6, 2011 - 4:11 am

    Only ugly girls need to learn how to pick-up guys! Men who have low self-asteem will fall for those tricks but guys who have their own tricks won’t even bother giving them attention. These girls are made for men who don’t know anything about pickup artists!

    Clementine July 6, 2011 - 4:51 pm

    you guys..wow. You really don’t know anything about women do you?

    Most women don’t go out looking for meaningless sex. There certainly are women who go out looking for that, and I don’t personally think there’s anything wrong with that. There are still a lot of people out there who would look down that type of woman. That’s social conditioning. Most women go out hoping they can meet someone they can have fun with. Maybe a fling or relationship.

    Why would there be a FPUA? I am a 25 year old woman, an 8, with a very good personality, but also very bad at the game (Hopefully getting better). Have you ever considered that maybe we don’t want to wait around hoping someone we might be attracted to will come up to us? Maybe the only guys who come up to me are 3oo lbs. or fucking annoying. I like the option of going to talk to guys or girls that I find attractive. Guys and girls are very similiar as far as the game. Guys of course are easier to game, girls tend to have more walls up.

    Looks are not enough, trust me. Maybe for some guys. I can always count on looks to get me in the door, but I’ve lost many people because of my poor game. Believe it or not, not all guys are completely shallow, and do require some game.

    Girls like to conquer people too. We like to conquer our own fear. That’s why we try to pick up too.

    alphawolf July 8, 2011 - 10:15 am

    @ Clementine

    Agreed. Thanks for sharing.

    Chris July 11, 2011 - 12:55 am

    Well seems like Kezia wouldn’t have any problem what so ever picking anyone up! ;)

    M August 3, 2011 - 4:18 pm

    As a straight woman, I would have to say learning a lot about this community over the past 5 years has lead me to a couple of conclusions.

    Some men really need to learn this stuff. I mean really learn and practice. Get good at it. Learn the principles behind the stuff, so you can make it work for you. It’s obvious when someone is new at it, but everyone started somewhere. Maybe it’s the side of me with a heart but if I know that the guy is running canned material that everyone has heard, I tend to play along or be more polite than usual. Only one time have I ever admitted to knowing where it was from, but the guy asked me a direct question.

    As far as the female side is concerned, I tend to be more of a fan of creating more opportunities for guys to approach and make feel like they really are running the whole thing. I have been accused of being an fpua. While I’m not a feminist, I believe that I should be with the high value man that I want and not have to settle for whoever comes up to me.

    alphawolf August 3, 2011 - 7:17 pm

    @M: Thanks for the support, and more power to FPUAs. If I was a hot chick, I’d want to be with the highest value guy I can find as well, all things being equal.

    Soulman August 13, 2011 - 12:59 am

    So why would females even want to know about female pick up when women have magazines like Cosmo, and many shows dedicated to helping women such as Dr. Phil as well as the plethora of woman’s magazines that actually help out with relationships.

    All men have is PUA websites, and now women wantot take over it by trying out this female PUA astuff rather than using magazines.

    There is even a book for bi-sexual women on how to get women that was best seller.

    Clementine August 13, 2011 - 9:17 am

    The sooner you realize that men and women are really the same, the better. Magazines have articles about keeping a guy or being good at things sexually. If you are a woman and that’s really all you care about, that is weak. Would you really want someone that cares about something superficial like that more than herself? Weak.

    Soulman August 13, 2011 - 7:31 pm

    Also, to the above poster, there are many books on actually helping women have a relation ship and keep their man, as well as a whole array of youtube vids for women to do this, while there is almost nothing for men.

    Now what I say next may sound like I’m trying to start a flame war and being sexist, but I’m not, I’m just presenting my point while trying my best to not offend anybody.

    The sooner you realize that women are given more advantages regarding social and dating world, then more you will realize that they have even more resources at their disposal.

    Boys grow up with far less social skills.
    What does a boy do when he is growing up and in his teenage years: plays with cars, plays sport, but these day mostly video games and comic books or from time to time, be in a band. Now sports is not always a social hobby, and since most young boys grow up playing video games, that is obviously not social. A band is a very social hobby , but not as many young boys grow up starting that.

    Now women grow up pretty much learning about social skills fro ma young age. When women have sleep overs, talk about things like dolls and how to dress from that much of a young age, read mags about body language and pretty much practice that stuff in mirrors, by the time they are 18, they know how to properly read body language and socialize.

    Women are raised up on social skills , thus it seems pointless for women to need PUA since these are all the skills that women grow up with. I have heard young girls aged 14 and 13 use negs for example, and the really soft one, they are better at teasing than young boys as well. Now I’m not saying that negs are important, but just stating the magnitude at how well social conditioning favors women whilst growing up compared to men.

    See PUA Is the one place where a man can learn these skills . It is very difficult to grow up with those skills because in western culture, with the influence of the media , high divorce rates and feminism, it just does not happen for young boys, they do not develop into strong men who can read body language and be naturally social.

    dany September 2, 2011 - 10:07 am

    Im female and in my youth (high school and early college days) I was somewhat of a natural fpua. Now that i’ve recently graduated and just gotten out of a 3 year long term relationship, Im really rusty. Back then I was probably an 8 with decents looks and lots of confidence that lifted my level. Now im like a 5 or on a good day a 6 and definitely less confident. I use to have sex with who I wanted and when I wanted. I didnt care about labels such as slut or anything. I also use to like the ego boost of getting those who I would considered high up on the attractive list. Yes numbers under my belt were important but so was quality.

    Although I havent officially gotten back in the game, I would like to prep myself before I do jump in. Currently, im getting hit on by 5s and down. This does not please me. As we all know sexual arousal starts with the mind. If he is not hot and has barely anything to compensate for that, how on earth am I suppose to be turned on. Merely looking at a dick just doesnt do it for me.

    So instead of waiting for 5s to come my way, I want to go after at least 7s or higher. Im not sure if the fpua techniques are any different from the regular pua ones. We all know that im going to have to pull out my bag of tricks to give an illusion that i am way more attractive (ie. makeup, clothes , hair and etc). I’ve forgotten how to do all it. So my looks as well as game have all been lost. That is where fpua techniques are needed in my case.

    I hope my reason for wanting to learn fpua skills makes sense for why a woman would want to practice these techniques.

    dany September 2, 2011 - 10:53 am

    What I want to get our of learning fpua skills is the same as Charlotte’s goal. I’m not only interested in sex right now. I more so just want to talk and have guys wanting me. A good bit of the 5s and lower that have been coming my way are not on my intellectual or worldly level. That is not to say that many 10s are either.
    Right now its either be bored by their drivel and play along or have them lost because they dont know what im talking about. I just miss the witty banter, butterflies in my stomach and sexual tension. Is that to much for a girl to want?

    Soulman September 5, 2011 - 7:18 am

    Witty banter, butterflies in a woman’s stomach( just a metaphore) and sexual tension are all things guys must learn to lead with an initiate, and I have no idea why this is the case, it just is, I ma not trying to be sexiest, do not take this the wrong way. There is no way you can just try to make an attractive guy do this. If anything, you just stated why men have to learn this stuff and why women do not need this.

    Also regarding your bag of tricks(ie. makeup, clothes , hair and etc), don’t you learn that while growing up or from you female friends who can re-teach you that. Even a younger niece or sister can help out with that. A hair stylist can help out with you hair and a good fashion store can easily fix you up. I know all this because I roam about with my females friends who told me they do this stuff when they forget how to groom up for a big day/night.

    Regarding women that used to be super attractive and lost it since a break-up and have forgotten how to be fpuas, this is a mind set issue, not a question of learning all this . You just need to find that inner part of yourself that radiates happiness and positivity and it will all work out. Remember men are attracted to positivity and a bubbly nature and high energy , work on the high energy part of it.

    dany September 5, 2011 - 11:49 pm

    Soulman I get what you are saying about an attractive man not automatically coming with those attributes. OK, witty banter may be something he needs to learn. Now the butterflies are something I can only control. Well technically I cant but not just any one can give me those either. The sexual tension part has to be mutual. I don’t know if that can really be taught but skills can help conjure it. If these are things women (me) are looking for then what are guys looking for? Should I assume it is the opposite and say all they want is an easy lay? Wouldn’t they want the pretty slit in a skirt to be able to hold a decent convo ? Maybe not, I guess.

    Well, I not only want to attract guys but want the game to be fun for my prey as well. I want it to be as worth while to them as it is for me. A little bit of chase, a little bit of conquer and we all go home happy for the night.

    I understand that a good bit of what goes on in the pua theory and techniques may not necessarily apply to women. I see that learning some pua skills help females who like to be the aggressor. I see many aren’t tailored to women but with some alterations could work. Females need to know what to do once they are in front of their prey. You know, how to chat them up enough to get the message across? I mean I could be blunt and say “I like you. Now fuck me” but that is not enough. More than likely he will oblige but where is the fun and challenge in that. In addition to knowing what to say, I need to know the body language to convey my attractiveness and interest in them. I really don’t think words are enough. I would like to give the illusion that not only do I want what he has but make him think he wants to give it to me as well.

    I don’t even mind being a victim for someone else but once again I want the game to still be fun for the both of us. I don’t want to just to be a boring person while he applies game on me. I know i can say yes to everything and do all the right ioi. I don’t want to just have decent to good sex but beyond that come across as bland.

    Regardless of me being the aggressor or the victim, i want to come across as an enchantress. Its no fun just screwing them. As it has been mentioned many times before, it is not hard for women to get lays. So how do i keep up score while playing the game. My points come from having men come back for more whether it be for more sex or trying to date me. I want them to want me for more than just for looks. I want to posses that je ne sais quoi. Please don’t take this as me wanting them for more than sex or momentary company. Right now i really don’t want any type of relationship beyond fuck buddy, booty call or one night stand.

    These are the skills I want to learn. I cant find many published step by step manuals to teach me this. I may find a post here and there. I want more substance than the small chapters in Robert Green’s art of seduction. I’m not looking for skills on how to snag a man and keep him.

    dany September 6, 2011 - 12:07 am

    Now back to my personal issues. I know that I need to rebuild my confidence. I want to learn how to fake it until I have it just like a novice male pua. It may take time for me to regain my former bubbly personality and I don’t feel like waiting. Also, to make the assumption that i have females in my life to help me to be girly doesn’t apply to me. let me give you some back ground info. I’m 23 and I have only two female friends that are quite unconventional. Majority of my friends are male and so are my associates. I am the oldest of my siblings and the only girl. My mother doesn’t wear makeup and or even uses a purse. Other female family member live hundred to thousands of miles away from me. So being girly is a chore. I can do it only for so long but I some how get sucked back into my old (non girly) ways. Its like trying to remember things you learned in high school. I know I knew it, but something just isn’t clicking to make me understand it now. I need a refresher course.

    caçador September 9, 2011 - 12:48 am

    its only Theory, Se my movie playing Direct game in Youtube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6EpqU4juYKw

    Soulman September 10, 2011 - 10:29 am


    I am not trying to be rude or anything, I am just offering advise in the hopes of helping you and do not intend to create hostility.

    No you are wrong about men always wanting a slit between you skit to keep them invested. I have chatted to women who were moderately attractive and dressed in winter clothing, and they knew how to build rapport with me and that was what made me want to sleep with them. Now I won’t lie, physical looks are important to men and I am assuming you would have looked up the evolutionary basis for this,but it is not everything.

    See men just need someone to have commonalities with someone, some one they can feel warm emotions with. Unfortunately society has thought men to suppress this because” it is unmanly”, so this only makes it harder for women, but still possible by keeping a high energy and an enthusiastic frame while making sure your content builds rapport. It is not unmanly to express emotions or to feel emotions, it is unmanly to not be able to control emotions.

    The men that chat to you just because your beautiful are not bad per say, just deprived of sex cannot control their emotions. But don’t worry , most men you meet in the day time are not like that, only some of them.

    Calling men prey is a very bad mentality to begin with. This mean that you are very goal oriented and most like have some sort of objectification towards men. objectification only clouds you judgment. When I stopped objectifying women, I could think clearly while talking to women and be more expressive with my emotions.

    When I talk to girls, I do not think of them as prey, I think of them as people that I am getting to meet, and I do not even have thoughts of wanting to have sex with them, just thought of meeting a new friends. Yes they are attractive, but that does not mean I automatically mean I want to have sex with them.

    See I think you have a problem of just enjoying a conversation for what it is and enjoying socializing, when I had this problem ,I never had liaison with women, but now I do because I think about wanting to be intimate with them mid-way during the conversation. And if the conversation was too casual, then I’ll just be friends with them.

    Learn to enjoy the interaction process. There is no such thing as faking it til you make it, I tried that and so many other people I know have and they got nowhere. Improving your social skills and enjoying it is what is important as well.

    Orbitor October 16, 2011 - 10:35 pm

    Yo AlphaWolf,

    You should put easy links to the Female Guru page here & in the contents!

    alphawolf October 16, 2011 - 10:51 pm

    Yo Orbitor, Done.

    fire October 24, 2011 - 10:54 pm

    Some of the comments here really make me just…groan. Some of the guys commenting seem to be so utterly clueless about women, can’t be very successful as so-called ‘PUA’s’

    SOME of the guys, not all, fortunately some of you do seem to have a clue what you’re talking about.

    I’m a 24 year old woman, I’m tall, blonde, thin, attractive, intelligent, used to model was ‘scouted’ in my youth but I hated it. I’m not gonna call myself a 10 because to me pretty much no one is a 10, except maybe a couple of really hot actors/actresses, I tend to mark people as a 9 at the highest. I’m a catch anyway that is for sure, and I do get hit on all the time. The problem is though, that when it comes to very attractive women, who do you think hits on us? It’s the over-confident, often sleazy, arrogant guys that hit on us. Other guys oh they LOVE to talk to the really hot women, they love to try and get close to us, try and get some time with us, have a little chat, admire our beauty, but do they make a move? MOST of the time they don’t, because MOST of the time they think “why bother? She obviously get’s hit on all the time and probably by much hotter guys than me” – and yes I’ve actually been told that. Not that I don’t already know it. So there is one reason why a woman might want to learn a few PUA skills. Because part of being a PUA is about the way you make the other person feel, and having some control over the reactions they are having towards you. I don’t want guys to feel intimidated by me, for example.

    Another thing is, take into account personality a bit. Not all women are the same. Not all men are the same. People are different. In general we are told men like the thrill of the chase, and in general that’s true. But you know what, some women love the thrill of the chase too. Especially when it comes to high-achieving women that are used to taking the wheel, they don’t want the guy that tries to pick them up, they want to be one doing the picking up. There is nothing wrong with that, and if you think that all guys are like you (PUA’s) then you can’t know that many guys. So many guys don’t have the confidence to hit on women, they have to get really drunk before they will even try, and by that point they are just a drunken, slobbering mess.

    Also, the whole idea that men are only after sex and women are after everlasting love is a total myth, I know women that pretty much only want sex and a bit of fun from guys, and I know guys that are totally romantic and always want to have a girlfriend or be in a relationship, and who “don’t do” ONS. Well, what of the women, especially women who have reached an age where most people are actually looking for something serious (I don’t mean me, at 24 it’s an even mix of people who just want to fuck around and people looking for something serious), who only want sex? They are just the same as any guy PUA who is looking for casual hook-ups and ONS but has to pretty much lead a girl on to get her in to bed.

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