Quick Definition: The mindset that you’re just giving candy away because it makes you and other people happy.
Remember the girl at Halloween who had a basket and was giving away candy and sweets? Or maybe she was in your classroom or at your birthday. Didn’t she look attractive? She wasn’t there to impress anyone. She was simply sharing her joy for the occasion.
When you give someone a piece of candy, you don’t expect anything in return. If someone days “no”, you don’t take it personally. Plenty of people like candy. Maybe that guy has a problem with sugar.
The candy giver is made of pure value – he gives candy to his friends and strangers simply because he can. There’s no “taking” of value. This frame helps new guys understand what its like to be alpha, and to genuinely be a good guy in a dominant, having fun sort of way.
Tactically, this frame is important in stopping moving sets, and also in quickly establishing rapport and getting compliance. You can use the candy giver frame + dominance (leading, no permission seeking) to lead a set. This way the guy comes across as super cool, not asking for permission, yet oozing out pure social value.
Try embodying the candy giver frame tonight in your interactions.
Contributed By: Owen Cook