• Banter Lines

    by AlphaWolf & Co.

    Posted by Vapor

    She drops/spills/etc. something, “This is why we can’t have nice things.”

    Posted by Eclectic
    ‘You’re so cute when your angry’ (squeeze her cheek)
    Posted by Dr. Zeus
    -Which one of you guys would win in a fight?
    -You’re taking this way too seriously
    -Stop flirting with me
    -If that were true, you wouldn’t love me
    -You must’ve driven your parents crazy
    -Give me a kiss on the cheek, and maybe I’ll let you forgive me
    -I’m too high maintenance for you
    -What else do you like about me?
    -I’m so out of your league
    -Let’s play a game. Let’s see how long you can hold your breath
    -You’re back to square one with me, missy
    -You’re so outside the circle of trust

    -How short are you?
    -You’re such a player
    -You guys remind me of the Power Puff Girls/or/ You guys are like watching The View
    -Do your parents know where you are
    -Isn’t this a school night
    -You’re makeup is smudged
    -Bartender, you might want to check this girl’s ID again
    -We should hang out some time. You can help me pick up chicks
    -You girls aren’t toursists, are you?
    -Holy shit, you really don’t know what you’re doing, do you?
    -Careful girl, I’m a heartbreak waiting to happen
    -Your ex boyfriend sounds just like me
    -I’m so emotionally unavailable right now
    -I think you might make a nice friend
    -We need to find you a man
    -We would never get along

    You: We’re too much a like. We’d never get along
    Her: Why?
    You: Because we’d never have anything significant to argue about. So we’d have to make up petty little things

    to fight about… And I’d always win.
    Her: No you wouldn’t
    You: Yes I would
    Her: No
    You: You see, we’re arguing right now… And you started it
    Her: No I didn’t. You did
    You: OMG, just let it go. If you’re going to keep acting like this, I will so have to break up with you
    Her: (Whatever. Doesn’t matter)
    You: Hey, but at least we’d have good make up sex
    Her: (Whatever)
    You: Yeah, just kidding anyways. We don’t have to get in arguments to have sex

    Here’s another argue routine, I think it was Harlequin who once posted in a field report.

    You: Do you want to have an argument?
    Her: No
    You: Yes you do

    Her: Can I help you?
    You: Yeah, I need a back rub and a warm bath

    You: Hey, you’re not shoplifting, are you?
    Her: No, I work here
    You: What’s the matter, the employee discount not enough for you?

    You: So what do they pay you here, like $10,000 a week?
    Her: No
    You: Oh, that’s too bad. I was going to ask you out. But I’m looking for a rich girl

    Her: Nice to meet you
    You: I’m sure it is

    Her: Have a nice day
    You: Hey, don’t tell me what to do

    Posted by Harlequin
    In a quiet bar: “GET OFF MY COCK!”
    When she offers up a whimsical idea…”Girl, you’re nuttier than Squirrel-shit.”

    Posted by Face
    “While you’re down there…” [I say this under my breath anytime a girl drops somethig or bends down for any reason]

    Posted by fad3r
    If a girl tells me brb or I will talk to you later I respond with “don’t threaten me!”

    Posted by Vincent Chase
    Wearing an article of clothing rather tight or noticably lacking/small.
    “What the matter? Couldn’t find anything in your size? Maybe you should stop shopping at the Baby Gap.”

    funny-gif-dog-catching-play-falls

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