A list of tips about Approaching

Unknown post from old forums on approaching:

I put together a handy list of crucially important things to do when you approach a beautiful woman.

1.  Have a canned opener ready — This is NOT a night at the improv. Going “situational” (e.g., “it sure is crowded here” or “that’s a nice purse”) will rarely work. Remember
last time when we talked about how the average girl has been hit on 5,000 times before you came along? Well, most of those 5,000 guys have tried something boring and situational. Use a canned opener — something that has been repeatedly tested with women and is proven to work.

2.  3-2-1-GO — The three-second rule was created for a reason. When you see a girl you like, GO. Open her group within three seconds. The failure to do this will “stale you
out”. Women like confidence. They don’t like to be stalked. They like spontaneity. Wandering around circling her, looking at her, trying to figure out what to do next will turn her off and creep her out. Get into the habit of seeing attractive women and GO in. You’ve already got your opener ready, right?

3.  Approach at an angle — Do not walk straight up to the group. Approach at angle, tilt your head over your shoulders, and say your piece. Done correctly (and you almost need to see it to do it properly), you raise your value significantly by demonstrating that you do not need their attention or approval.

4.  Smile on the approach — Don’t grin like a moron through the entire interaction, but smile as you walk to the set, and in the first few seconds of the opener. Smile with your eyes, not just your mouth.

5.  Be loud enough — Everyone in the group should hear your opener. Your opener should be loud enough that it cuts across whatever conversations they are already having. Don’t shout, but make it socially awkward for them not to pay attention to your opener.

6.  Don’t lean in — This is connected to being loud enough. You should project your voice enough that they can hear you from a normal standing position (or leaning slightly back).

7.  Engage the group — Do NOT go into a group and talk to the woman you want to meet (the target). Engage the whole group. Pay LESS attention to the target.

8.  Neg the target — You should know what negs are by now. The hotter the girl, the quicker you have to neg. I’ve seen Mystery open with a neg, as well as negging the target within the first 10 seconds of his opener.

There. Do those things, and you should be able to get through A1 (the opener). As soon as you spot the opportunity, shift gears into A2 (interest/attraction).

I also wanted to talk about some basic fashion and style tips. 1. Untuck that shirt — Don’t go out to a social gathering with a collared, button-down shirt that is tucked in. It’s not in style. Trust us.

2. Be taller — There are plenty of brands of very fashionable shoes and boots that give you extra height. I’m 5’10 normally and 6’1 in the kick-ass pair of black buckled dress shoes that have a couple of inches underneath. Just by itself this has made me more attractive to a large number of women and has given me a chance with some women who wouldn’t have talked to me before.

3. Burn that t-shirt — Don’t wear a white t-shirt under your dress shirt. That’s so late 80s. It conveys a lack of sexuality. Undo the top two buttons of your shirt (no more!) and show a tiny bit of your chest. If this exposes mounds of chest hair, then get that taken care of too. While you’re at it, get rid of short-sleeved button-down shirts too.

4. Get some ornamental stuff — Earrings, funky shoes, rings, hats, scarves, neck-chains, wrist bands, whatever. Get something. What is purely ornamental (e.g., a double breasted suit, cuff links, a peacock’s tail) is sexy. What is purely functional generally is not. See what Mystery, Lovedrop, Sinn, DJ, and the Prophet look like in the field and you’ll get it.

5. Make your clothes fit — Why spend $80 on a shirt off the rack that doesn’t fit if you won’t spend $5-$10 to have it altered? If it doesn’t fit you perfectly, spend a couple of bucks, take it to a dry cleaner/alterations place, and get them to make it fit.

6. Remove excess hair — If you have any hint of your eyebrows touching, wax or shave them so there is separation. Nose and ear hairs are sexy to NO ONE. Make sure your sideburns, if you have them, have a neat line and definition and are at the same length on each side. Most women prefer shaved chests too, though this depends somewhat on individual preferences.

7. Squelch acne — First, if you’re still getting acne, see a dermatologist. Second, for your acne scars, consider laser skin care (expensive) or makeup (cheap). Get a female friend to help you buy a cover up stick and some powder. You can make your zits vanish for the night.

8. Whiten your teeth — It’s cheap and easy. Go through your dentist, not those white strips. No excuses.

9. Work out — No excuses. Just do it.

10. Glasses — Glasses are sexy on some men. They are not on most men. Try contacts or surgery. Savoy tells me that of the bootcamp students he’s seen, in 8 months he’s told dozens of guys to take off their glasses. Only two guys looked as good or better with their glasses back on.

11. Relax — Have you done all of this? Great. Now you’re out meeting women, don’t worry about this anymore. You’ve done the best you can with what you have. Girls WILL notice. A 6 who takes care of himself (and looks like an 8 because of it) is infinitely more attractive to a woman than an 8 who is a slob (and stays an 8).

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