AKA Social Validation
Quick Definition: A feeling of being accepted and worthy within the larger social group .
Validation is an important part of the social hierarchy and how each individual within a tribe receives feedback relative to their position within that tribe. One might argue that an alpha male is simply the member of the tribe that receives the most social validation.
Experiments have shown that authority figures tend to give more validation to new people. In certain companies, conforming to corporate culture gives you professional validation. For example, at an innovative tech company, disruptive personal projects may be encouraged, while such innovative projects may be too disruptive for a more traditional industry. The corporate culture determines the types of employees that excel in that corporate environment. One skill may promote an employee to a manager, while at another company it deters him from further advancement.
Elliot (Bedazzled) listens to the Devil about not catering to “being good enough” and seeks another wish for Allison’s validation:
Always keep in mind that we are no longer single tribe members, but rather a kaleidoscope of tribes among different groups.
The most important part of validation is that of SELF VALIDATION—a process that comes from satisfying the ego. As PUAs, we get validation from getting girls and dating multiple girls. Fine. Do not let this twist your original goal of happiness. The ego may feel good about a MLTR, but you yourself may prefer an exclusive relationship.
Don’t seek validation externally – you will never be satisfied.
Posted by Vince Lin on April 21, 2012