Newbie's Paradox

Knowledge Sphere:

Quick Definition: Paradoxes in ideology that the newbie must deal with in the beginning of learning seduction that seem to contradict one another.

Full Definition:

This concept relates to the general “paradoxes of game” post. Essentially, these are the paradoxes that newbies face.

One of the apparent contradictions is the idea of Authenticity vs. Change. Some PUAs advocate being authentic to our core self. JM, for example, believes that inside every man is a bright and shiny individual. You just have to sculpt away at the marble to find the real masterpiece. MM and other methods believe that there needs to be a fundamental shift in the person’s identity to become “sex worthy”. As Tyler and Mystery would say, “How can you find deep identity level change when you have been a chode all of your life?” In these cases, the clay must be sculpted into a new form.

Another newbie’s paradox is regarding the level of indifference toward his results versus the belief that his actions will work. On one hand, PUAs advocate being outcome independent and not caring about the results. On the other hand, we admit that at the end of the day, a good instructor is someone who can help his students get laid. Yes, women are people too, but can you close and get results? Nothing else matters but the mission!

To become a an artist requires change. But, at the beginning of trying on new things, there is going to be a period of “try-hard” behavior as the newbie becomes accustomed to the new rules of the game. But yet the game advocates not being a “try hard” and being real.

These concepts are just some examples of the newbie’s paradox. In thinking over these ideas, the community has come up with some explanations:

1. Real change occurs when deep identity level change takes place and this happens in tandem with the person discovering their real self

2. The PUA should be outcome independent during the interaction, but in the long term, have their sights set towards a goal. Measure your successes along the way.

3. Try hard, but also admit that you are new to this. Admitting that you are new puts the pressure away and also lets you focus on yourself rather than other people.

Paradoxes exist in all subjects of study, but particularly in pickup, because of the philosophical nature of the discussions on the forums. Ultimately, the truth lies in the field, for the person to experience on their own.

Usage:

n/a – concept

Related Terms: Game Paradoxes, Congruence, Inner Game, Score, Identity, Direct Game, Indirect Game, Vibe, Authenticity, Social Robot

Related Links:

Article on the meaning of “paradox” on Wikipedia

Source: RSD

Definition by Vince Lin

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