Quick Definition: AA is the fear that arises when doing a cold approach on a woman or group of women (or group of strangers, including men).
Full Definition:
Nearly every man has a fear of making the initial approach. This fear is often attributed to an evolutionary survival mechanism that arose from living in tribal communities of less than 50 people where approaching the wrong woman could mean genetic suicide.
Nowadays, it can also be based on other factors such as poor past experiences with women, shyness, and a cultural feeling of inappropriateness of approaching strangers. AA is reduced with lots of practice, and knowledge that you have a solid strategy.
The fear never really goes away, according to most mPUAs, and as Juggler says, “that is a good thing. You have something to live for, to fear and conquer. The day you no longer feel fear during an approach, is the day you need to find something else to do that has enough meaning to cause fear in you.”
Usage:
I had some serious AA before I opened the set, but I felt a lot better once the set hooked.
Related Terms: Anti-AI, IOI, Approach Invitation, 3 Second Rule, Hook Point, C&B
Related Links:
- Approach Anxiety – Blog of Eric Disco that talks about pickup and overcoming AA
- Approach Anxiety – Site profile from the SeductionList Directory
“Nearly every man has a fear of making the initial approach. This fear is often attributed to an evolutionary survival mechanism that arose from living in tribal communities of less than 50 people where approaching the wrong woman could mean genetic suicide.”
As in getting killed for it or something?
Yes. In the tribal communities, it means social suicide, which results in genetic suicide. This is why for some guys, approaching a HB is harder than, say, jumping into a steel cage with sharks swimming around in the water. Things have since changed, we no longer live in 50 people tribes, there are millions of girls everywhere, so this fear, as real as it is, is illogical.
yeah I had the hardest time figuring out why i trip balls when i approach girls, even though naturally i’m very confident approaching anyone that i dont have the intent of dating.
yeah, AA is rooted in biological evolution. Our emotional circuitry could not keep up with the speed of societal evolution
Yeah… it can be pretty tough, but you can improve the results of your approaches by a lot. This will help you build approach confidence, which will eventually help you get rid of approach anxiety for good.
I find just automatically saying hi to anyone that gets within 3 feet of me reduces my approach anxiety over time! Great Article!!
I did approach a couple of women with my friends this couple of days and it’s easier to approach when you are with your friends it’s more exciting and a lot more fun.Right now i agree with you if we lose the fear of approaching then it wont be interesting and exciting it will be boring
I think this mind-trick alleviates my AA very much: I just think about these facts sometimes and especially right before I approach: One of my hobbies is collecting autographs of celebrities. It has never been difficult for me to go to some celebrity and ask his or her autograph. Celebrities are just people, after all. So, why on earth it would be any more difficult to go to some girl and start talking to her? Of course, I also need to have some opener and other routines in my mind, so I really have something to say.
Also participating storytelling-night (AKA Cuentacuentos) is good thing: I learn to perform my story I am going to use during storytelling phase of my pickup. On the other hand, if I really dare to tell my stories or otherwise perform in front of audience, then talking in front of some girl is just a piece of cake.
BTW I have heard, that also doing stand-up comic as hobby for a while is good for learning pickup, but I haven’t done it, yet.
Pardon my English. It is ”Stand-up comedy”.