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  • Cocky&Funny Lines Collection

    By on February 5, 2015

    I didn’t know rolex made plastic watches

    Nice……..You Buy that new?

    When they bump you “Did you just grab my ass……..Damn”

    I could marry a woman like you. (Be serious)…. I’d divorce you a week later and take half you money.

    (When complimented) Can’t you come back with something more original?

    No I’m not going home with you. Why don’t you buy me a drink?

    Aren’t you going to open the door for me

    What’s your problem?

    I think I need to get in touch with my inner lesbian. I’d probably spend too much on batteries though.

    Serious. Oh so is this the part where your gonna give me your little opinion oh that’s so cute. ok go ahead.

    When she says. As if (seriously) reply “isn’t that cute”

    Old enough to answer a question like that.

    Misinterpret everything and tell her to back off

    When they bust back

    Yeah? To her lines

    Save yours for a good spot.

    Her good ones hehehehe

    Bust on bad ones.

    Suspisios question. Say how old are you quickly

    Disses my stuff thanks for noticing.

    Yes your ass looks fat in those pants

    I was on the phone with your mom

    What gave you the idea that we were

    Why are you bringing up sex for the first time. What are you frustrated

    Why do you wan’t to learn how? Are you bisexual

    I just call it like it is

    Fake emotions are classic

    Act offended

    They laugh and are pissed

    Laugh and your loser.

    Don’t see her more than 1 or 2 a week

    End every meet

    Call me don’t make plans after 1st be open to possibilities

    Misinterpret everything

    Why do people who know the least know it the loudest?

    Take my advice; I don’t use it anyway.

    I was so poor growing up … if I wasn’t a boy… I’d have had nothing to play with.

    I don’t now what your problem is but I bet it’s hard to pronounce

    I’ll try being nicer if you’ll try being smarter

    Don’t hate yourself in the morning. Sleep till noon

    Two billion years of evolution and that’s what you come up with

    Do they ever shut up on your planet

    Don’t worry. I forgot your name too

    You look like shit. Is that in style now

    I’m sorry, do I resemble your therapist

    I don’t have an attitude; I have a personality you can’t handle.

    I have decided to live forever, or die in the attempt

    If God had intended man to smoke, he would have set him on fire.

    Save your breath. You’ll need it to blow up your date!

    Smile, it’s the second best thing you can do with your lips.

    The sex was so good that even the neighbors had a cigarette.

    Money can’t buy everything… but then again neither can no money.

    I can please only one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow isn’t looking good either.

    Beauty is only a light switch away.

    God made pot. Man made beer. Who do you trust?

    I bought some powdered water, but I don’t know what to add.

    If Bush were captain of the Titanic, he’d say we were stopping for ice.

    In every episode of Seinfeld there is a Superman somewhere.

    Ten percent of the Russian government’s income comes from the sale of vodka

    The name Wendy was made up for the book “Peter Pan.”

    The strongest muscle in the body is the TONGUE.

    The average human eats 8 spiders in their lifetime at night.

    The average chocolate bar has 8 insects’ legs in it.

    Here’s a cocky statement:

    “Her dress makes her look fat.”

    Here’s a Cocky + Funny statement:

    “If she doesn’t find a dress that fits better, the fashion police are going to send in the SWAT team for her ass.”

    Get it?

    Start with arrogance, then add humor.

    So why does it work to attract women?

    Well, the short (email newsletter size) answer is:

    COCKY AND FUNNY ATTRACTS WOMEN BECAUSE IT QUICKLY AND DIRECTLY SAYS ALL THE RIGHT THINGS ABOUT YOU.

    Women are attracted to “alpha male” types – We all know that. Women are attracted to a sense of humor. We all know that one too.

    Women AREN’T attracted to men who give away their power, kiss up to them, smother them with attention, act like whipped puppies, and get nervous just being in the same room with them.

    If you meet an attractive woman, and IMMEDIATELY start giving her a hard time about something, busting on her, and have fun, it basically says:

    “You are interesting enough to talk to, but you’re going to have to do a lot more than just look good to impress me. Your beauty doesn’t make me nervous in the slightest, I’m perfectly calm, and in fact, I’m so comfortable that I just noticed something about you that I’m going to make fun of…”

    There is no faster way on earth to communicate all the right attitudes, beliefs, self-image, comfort, confidence, and power than to be Cocky + Funny.

    (Except maybe to put on a perfect Brad Pitt costume.)

    Once you start using this attitude, you will be totally astounded at the results.

    Here’s a low-risk example:

    Next time you’re at the grocery store in the checkout line paying for your groceries, say:

    “So how much of this cash do you get to keep?” (as you hand her the money)

    She’ll probably laugh and say: “None… I wish.”

    To which you can respond with:

    “Oh, I figured you were pocketing 10 or 20%… I assumed you were rich and could support me, but now I’m not interested… I want a rich girl.” (Turn up your nose)

    This is a great one. It’s always fun to ask a woman if she’s rich or famous, then when she says that she’s not, tell her that it messed up her chances with you, and that you’re not interested anymore. One of the keys to the Cocky + Funny attitude is to never “crack.” If she opens her mouth and gives you the “I can’t believe you just said that” look, you need to turn it up a notch…Most guys will crack and say “Oh, I was just kidding.”DON’T DO THAT! It makes you look like a wussy.In the example above, if the checker looks at you and gives you the open mouthed “I can’t believe you said that” look, and says

    “Hey! I may not be rich, but I’m nice!”, you just look at her and say “Nice isn’t good enough, I need RICH AND nice.”

    Your goal is not to upset a woman, but to get under her skin enough by teasing, busting on her, and acting cocky and funny that it ignites the magical challenge/ attraction mechanism.

    By the way, once you can see that you’re getting a good response from a woman, GET HER NUMBER. Or get her email. Don’t stand around like a dork trying to make her laugh.

    As you become better and better with these tools, you can then begin “extending” the conversation… increasing the attraction… andtaking things to the “next level”.So get out there and use it, because the magic formula of Cocky + Funny will create all kinds of good things for you. You’ll see.

    And if you’re reading this right now and thinking to yourself “I really need to learn how to master this Cocky & Funny thing”, then I AGREE

    funny dating meme3

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