Boyfriend Destroyer (BFD)
 | Knowledge Sphere: | Real Social Dynamics |
Quick Definition: A PUA routine used to get a woman to leave her boyfriend for the pickup artist.
Full Definition:
BF Destroyers can be short term (such as a gambit) or longer term (such as a pattern of behavior). Short term routines for BF Destroyers range from respectful and naughty to outright malicious. Use of BF Destroyers depends on the situation and the PUA’s morality scale.
Zan’s approach, for example, is more zen-like:
PUA: “So Amanda. Would you like to go riding with me tomorrow?”
HB: “I have a boyfriend.”
PUA: “That’s not what I asked. :) Do you feel like going riding with me tomorrow?”
HB: “Hm…..yes, but…I have a boyfriend.”
PUA: “We will be discreet. I promise. I’ll pick you up at 8.”
It can also take the form of comedy:
HB: I have a boyfriend.
PUA: Man I have only known you for a bit and you’re already telling me your problems.
Or a Neg disqualifier:
HB: I have a boyfriend.
PUA: Who said I was ever attracted to you in the first place? Why are you telling me you have a boyfriend? You have a “I am too pretty” complex, in which you think ever guy that talks to you wants you sooooo bad. [Smile] Actually, I just wanted you to buy me a drink.
It can also take form in irrelevance/ignorance:
HB: I have a boyfriend.
PUA: (ignores previous comment): So what is your favorite flavor of ice cream?
HB: What? I have a boyfriend.
PUA: That’s great. Congratulations. Did I ever tell you that story about being in a safari in Africa? (Stack forward)
More malicious BFDs work by getting the target to elicit negative values about her boyfriend. Bad mouthing her boyfriend will only lower the PUA’s value and make her defensive, so it is important to steer the conversation in a way that the target is the one who brings up all the negative things about the BF. At this point, the artist can pretend to defend her BF, which will encourage her to come up with more reasons for why she doesn’t like him. At the same time, he can subtly DHV himself to show that he is the better choice.
Usage:
She seemed like she was in an unhappy relationship, so I used a BFD pattern to get her to leave the venue with me.
Related Terms: BBF, BF, AMOG, Secret Society
Source: Tyler Durden, Zan
Related Links:
- How to Destroy the Boyfriend – Solid article on how to deal with women with BFs
I love this one.
HB: I have a boyfriend
PUA: Man I have only known you for a bit and you’re already telling me your problems.
I’ve use something like this is the past and followed it with a Ross Jeffries BFD pattern.